Why does things always has to end up like this?

Yesterday i was missing him. Now my heart aches, like its gonna break into two.
I know that's all my fault for making you so stress.
I know you can't have a good sleep everynight in camp.
I know when you're in camp and i'm outside, you'll think alot.
I know once there's a scar, it won't be easy to forget or even remove it.
I know everyday you worry what i'm doing outside which you can't see and know.
I know that i've made you very sad and disappointed.

But

I know i love you alot and i'm willing to change to be a better girlfriend.
I know you'll surely think alot in camp so i kept my promise by staying at home and be a good girl.
I know that you're having alot of problems in camp so i'm willing to share your stress with you.
I know army life is very tough so i'll listen to everything you ask me to do.
I know that weekends are the only time we can spend together so i kept my weekends free.
I know you care about me that's why you say those stuffs.
I know you are heart broken about that incident so i promise to change and i have.
I know everything, my dear, i really do.
And i know i really love you alot.

I'll keep all the promises that i've made.

Aww~ how much i miss my boyfriend. Tons, lots, many, much... Haii, now at home thinking of him. Miss him like fuck, but he's not here. From this week onwards, he won't have anymore nights out unless he's performance is good in camp. *sadds! Dear and i spent 2 whole weeks together. Now, once he is not by my side i feel very wierd. Really miss his presence. All i can do now is wait for friday. Countdown: 1 and a 1/2 day. Will be sleeping soon. *yawns!

i miss your presence
i miss your gentleness
i miss your overwhelming care
i miss your soft hands holding mine when i'm asleep
i miss your cosy huggs
i miss your sweet expression when you smile
i miss your soft and touching words
i miss your outstanding cooking
i miss your craziness
i miss your 'cold' jokes which never fail to make me laugh out loud
i miss your solo-singing
i miss all the happy and precious memories we had
i miss those outings which were one-of-a-kind
i miss your everything, my dear ♥

Counting down to our 6th month (half a year) : 10 days / 240 hours / 14400 minutes / 864000 seconds
*Woo! That looks like a long time.
But 5 months have already pass. Another few days is worth waiting. No matter how far the future is ahead of us, i know we'll be in it together. Through sickness or health, through better or worst, through richer or poorer, i'll never leave you. Being by his side forever ♥


I Love You, Jimmy Ang, to the max!

Happy Birthday To Charis,♥

Happy birthday to my dearest sister, Charis Pang!

Its been fifteen years with her, and all i have to say is she's such a lovable girl. Despite at times she make me fucking angry with her, but... since she'll be sister forever, let it pass on and we'll still be sisters for life. (: No matter what happens, i know she'll be there for me. Thanks for letting me be such a fortunate girl with a sister like you. Even at times when we disagree with each other, at the end., we still will agree with each other. Last but not least, iloveyou tons meimei ♥

Enjoy your fifteen'th birthday! -3-

Memories ♥

ferris wheel can give you the feeling of happiness, I can give you the real happiness.

you're my moon, I can only see you in the darkness but no one.

there're lights, the brightest is me and you, our love.

Our love is much more than a visit of merlion

(Photo wordings written by my boy, JimmyAng.)

8 May 2009

It was like the worst day of my life, at the end of the day. Went down bugis with my sister, it was very long after sometime that i accompanied my sister out. Many things happen. Starting from last monday onwards i was with staciy for almost everyday. Bugis was one of the place where we went. There we met apple, daniel, joel and co. From that day onwards, i made a terrible mistake by falling for a guy which i don't really know. I didn't know this mistake would end up so serious. Having trapped in this illusion, i didn't know that i have done something very wrong. I started to have feelings for apple. Time spend, 4days. And i had feelings for him. But friday was when it ended... My dear broke up with me. After returning the usb cable to him, i really thought it was the end. But in reality, it wasn't. Around 10pm going to 11, when we were at big bird ready to order our food. Out of the blue, dear appeared. We were shocked, especially daniel who told him that we were at clementi. Talked about 2-3 hours near big bird. At that time, i didn't know what to do. Everything was blank. Words in, words out. Don't know what to believe. It was a torture. The only words that keep running inside my mind was dear's words " if you don't follow me and stay here, you'll regret ." I didn't know why this few words were inside my mind. Fucking stress at that point. The ending... i got into dear's cab, pulled along charis and ming and we headed to boat quay. Felt really peaceful in the cab. No more talking, no people kaopei, no stress, no smashing of glass bottle. Stopped at mac, because charis was hungry. The conversation continued, in the end, we patched. The words that were in my mind at that time, made me never regret what i have chosen. I know i should not have any, even a slightest feeling to anyone when i already have a boyfriend. But i didn't know why until the truth about everything came to light. Heard alot of things which i didn't even know in the first place. If i knew what was his real side of him, i would definitely not have any feelings. I was blinded by people who treat me good on the surface, that was why i was so easily cheated by people in the past. I thought i have become cleverer and know what or who is right, but in the end i was just as stupid as before. Not knowing right from wrong. I sincerely apologise to my dearest boyfriend for cheating on him. I'm really sorry, dear. D:

9 May 2009

Everthing came to an end. Thank you dear for giving me one last chance to amend my mistakes. The promises i have made will be done. Never will i forget your chance despite being hurt by me. I'm sorry, once again. Left dear's house around 10. Before that staciy came over to talk to me. I really can't afford to lose such a good friend like her. I know i've let her down many times, i'm sorry girl. Cabbed down to see the merlion. Although it has been in singapore for many years, we suddenly felt like going over to see the view. It was very beautiful. Talked our hearts out at that place. At first we thought it was a romantic place but when we reached there were many people ._. Talking half way, suddenly a little cockraoch ran out from no where. Scary manszx. After that cabbed down to boat quay again. Drink until about 5 plus then cabbed home to dear's house to sleep. So tired lorhs.

10 May 2009
Happy Mother's Day! (: Love my mummy loads! Slept till afternoon before heading to accompany my family for mother's day dinner. Around 6plus dear's auntie said she wanted him to see a house that his mother and auntie want to buy for him. So i went along toos (: The area was small, house was small toos. But it was quite messy inside. It doesn't matter anyway because everything would be moved away. Around 7plus then cabbed down to hougang mall. After eating my father fetched me back to dear's house. Slacked there awhile before going to changi hospital because dear want to take mc. Left there around 11plus, cabbed down to geylang lor 9. Had the famous beef hor fan. It was damn nice! A must try! (: Then went to find denny at the lan. Played chinese version of dota. So boring canszx! After that we walked to a gambling lan shop. Everyone was using computers to bet here bet there. Dear and denny played jackpot. The worst game to earn money -.- Anyways headed to grandlink to play audi and english version of dota. And know what happened... my dear, a first time beginner, GODLIKE me! >:( Nevermind, i'll own him some day (:

11 May 2009

Wake up around evening. Dear decided to prepare dinner by himself. So we went to ntuc to buy all the grocery we needed. Chopping, shredding, stirring, slicing. It was a tough job to cook. But the end product was.. only one word can describe it 'Delicious!' First time my boyfriend cook for me. So honoured.. Aww~ ♥


So serious chopping the meat...

Chop, chop chop...

Marinating the pork.

Its done (: waiting...

Chopping again, but this time its mushhroom...

*shocked!?

Time to fryy...

Is it that scary? x:

Hmm, finally its testing time...

What a mess!

Spegetti boiling... * sorry don't know how to spell x:


The end product (:

*yummies!

Mmm...

A little of martell with cherryade (:

A photo taken with my beloved sister, miss those times...

The photos describe everything in my mind ♥

Every little things that he do, it makes my heart grow fonder and fonder. Nothing will be able to describe the love i have for him. Last but not least, 'iloveyou' ♥

*yawns. Now i'm tired. Slept around 11plus yesterday. So shag siah. *continue from previous post* The guys (apple & daniel) came at around 9 in the morning, if i'm not wrong. Drinking session at 9am!? Crazy.. But we did it. Actually we drank around 10 because before that the guys were playing ban 'luck' again. I was like so tired already. At one part i really buey tahan liaos so i went to the living room to have a nap. After awhile the guys came out to drink. Apple leas? Like a pig sleeping in my sister's room with air con hors. I'm such a good host (: Hahs. The guys were like crazy. They added damn alot of martell into each cup. I drink a few mouth-full feel very seh liaos. Stupid siah. Then poor ming kana bullied by those older guys. They are such a bully manszx! Keep ask ming to drink & drink if not need to spin at a point. Ming already seh, face redred & want vomit like that, but they still ask him drink. -.- Anyways dear drank quite alot toos. *he help me drink finish my cup, if not i can't go sleep. D: BULLIES.. Actually dear want sleep liaos, but still continue play drinking games with them. Around noon liddat then we can sleep peacefully~ The 3/4 of martell was gone within 1 hour plus. Scaryy. Then apple woke up, snored like a pig. Hahs. They slacked there until around 4plus. Dear & i woke up at that time toos. Still very sleepy. Then mummy said they were on the way home already so we packed and left the house. But my father messaged dear to ask him when he was free to have a talk. Since we were early, we decided to settle it at that point, no use dragging it las. They talked until 8plus. After that my father treated us to dinner before sending dear back to camp. Had alot of fun for the past 3days. No parents, no troubles, no timings. It was such fun, espeacially getting to spend loads of time with my precious baby.

Alrights now in lecture hall blogging. :x I would sure fall asleep if there is nothing to do. It is boring here. Going to train dota now. Cyas(!)

Went for a movie with dear and ming at gv, plaza sing. Watched the x-men origin, wolverine movie. It was damn nice can. (: Did'nt know it would be so nice to watch. People out there who haven't watch it yet must watch ehs (!) Hahs. Its really worth the money. After that cabbed back to dear's house to take back my things cum pack his things for later going back to camp. Around 3plus cabbed home with dear and ming again. And now we are here (: Hahs. youyang and his friend came over too. Now they playing ban 'luck'. But looks like there is no luck here. Hehes :0 Later daniel and co. will be coming over toos with his martell. Woohoo!~ Free liq. These two days were so fun. Parents not in singapore, soo shiok las. But they will be coming home later at 7pm. Sian-ed. Why can't good things always last.. Worst is need to wake up early tomorrow for school at EIGHT FIFTY need to reach school. Boring(!) bo bian las. x: Hope now daniel they'all won't dua us lorhs. Everyone waiting for his martell to come -.- Blog soon (:

Added photos. (:

Bao yu 'jie' & me at iluma toilet (:

Tickets to xmen origin, wolverine movie with dear & ming. It was damn nice (!)